yes, i feel upset. very upset. she’s rejecting me.
my heart shakes, my whole being withdraws, contracts.
i don’t want to be hurt and face outright rejection.
i withdraw first.
i don’t want to initiate any more contacts, conversations with her.
feel demeaned. as if she is passing a judgement
” we are very different. i can try be your friend and talk to you. but i am skeptical if our friendship can go any far.”
” i don’t really want to be your friend. too difficult, too troublesome, inconvenient, you have no value in my life, and our correspondence/ acquaintance/friendship does not serve me any purpose. coz we are too different.”
” i don’t see why you bother. but don’t try too hard. coz i am not going to try and make myself understand you nor make myself be understood.”
.
i don’t believe any one wants to be my friend. coz none of them did when i was young in school.
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