Unpleasant classroom experience

Attended a class today, supposed to be theoretical, but it’s not as heavy as i thought, coz it comprised only a brief overview of the subject-matters, and also for half time, i spaced out when i tuned in to speaker’s nagging-monotone as a matter of her habit. i am judgemental here.

it was a strange observation that everytime before i left house for her class, i experienced a negative experience at home with mom. (twice actually) i went there with foreboding coz the first class had me brewing with deep unsettling feelings throughout – not coz of speaker, but classmates.

this time i was relieved coz the class was really small. and i made extra effort to be comfortable and easy.

still i came home with two issues triggered – old-time issues, so not speaker’s fault either. one, money issue - i don’t batter an eyelid for HM’s class n sessions which cost more, how come i felt unsettling, pressured, petty about attending hers?! 

two, intellectualising/thinking – i really don’t like people who hold judgements about people who tend to be mentally-inclined. her point noted, taken, accepted – but she really crossed the line when she was hinting a personal judgement instead of objective illustration of subject-matter.

this was the second clash i had these 2 weeks. the last one was with a classmate, and she readily admitted that she was personally judgemental about it. HER trance.